Creating our hOMe School.
I have never been a fan of the public school system. Especially since having my own children. I believe in children having the freedom to explore without boundaries. To live and love and explore and thrive in nature. I have been thinking, in my heart and soul, about homeschooling the boys and since the pandemic hit and we have literally been thriving at home together, the universe is sending me a sign clear as day, that the time is now. I had purchased The Call of The Wild + Free almost a year ago, and just dove head first into reading it a few months ago. Wow, was my mind blown. Every single page was a heck yes, heck yes, heck yes! Ainsley Arment is a beautiful writer, photographer, and has really revitalized the home school idea and philosophy. After signing up for the monthly bundle subscriptions, I am ready. SOIL bundle was just released and we are having a blast diving into the material (both the kids and myself!).
"Our Desire is to Give Our Children a Quality Education But Also to Preserve The Adventure, Freedom and Wonder of Childhood"
- Ainsley Arment : Founder Wild + Free
Click here to connect with me about the CT River Valley Wild + Free group!
"Our Desire is to Give Our Children a Quality Education But Also to Preserve The Adventure, Freedom and Wonder of Childhood"
- Ainsley Arment : Founder Wild + Free
Click here to connect with me about the CT River Valley Wild + Free group!
The time is now. Creating boundaries with technology.
I have heard Jess Davis (founder & CEO of Folk Rebellion) speak a few times now. Every time I am enamored with her every word, and the lifestyle she has created. However today; after listening to her interview on The Getaway Podcast; I feel an intense call to action around creating boundaries, in my life, with technology. Now you will hear Jess say things like "digital detox" and for me that just doesn't work. The last thing I need is to hold myself to an unrealistic expectation, just to fail and be that much harder on myself for
This quote is everything.
Ok, Everytime I read this quote I do one of the following ... smile ear to ear, laugh out loud, want to fist pump Cheryl Strayed and say HELL YEAH, feel my stomach knot up, get scared shitless, or let my mind start swirling around with all the things I am not doing that I feel like I should be doing. WOAH, what a whirlwind of feelings; emotions; thoughts. Hello postpartum!
Here is the thing. Life is hard. Life is scary. Life throws you curveballs. Life is beautiful. Life is anything YOU make of it.
All of the emotions and feelings that surface when you read this quote are normal, real, and accepted. Now it's up to YOU to get after your life in a way that makes sense; feels right; and supports your goals and dreams. This might look different on a day to day basis, and in looking at the big picture, every small detail of life is working towards a vision, goal, dream, core value; that is important to you.
Now get rid of the excuses, un-peel the layers, sit in the mess if necessary, and start to work towards THIS. You got this mama.
Hello October. Hello Fall. Hello SELF LOVE.
Fall is by far my FAVORITE season. Now that we are planted in the beautiful Northeast of the US of A; we get to experience ALL THE FALL THINGS again; with our boys of course. The changing leaves. the smell of the cinnamon pine cones, apply picking, pumpkin picking, hay rides, cider doughnuts {I mean you have to indulge every now and again, right} .... I mean - HEAVEN!
With the changing of the season comes setting some intentions, clearing the air, letting go, and inviting in new habits, rituals, commitments. For me SELF LOVE and mindfulness has fallen way off the radar. I would gather that most mama's out there would say the same thing. This commitment {I would even call it a human right} of giving back to ourselves, even if it is just for 5 minutes during your busy day; it is just way to important to not place focus on. I for sure know that when I even have 5 minutes in the car, alone, blasting MY music, I feel a sense of rejuvenation and energy that I can then apply to my boys and our home environment, making it that much more pleasant for everyone involved.
SO, as we all know, this is HARD WORK!
Recently I was inspired by listening to Shonda Moralis {author of Breathe Mama Breathe - 5 Minute Mindfulness For Busy Moms} speak on the Rock Your Bliss pod cast about all the ways we as busy mama's can incorporate 5-minute mindfulness breaks throughout our day. Like when you are drinking your morning coffee or tea, while you are cooking or cleaning up, or showering, or packing lunch....
Some of my favorites are the 3 breathe hug {dreamy}, waking with gratitude, just dance {heck yeah}, and mommy high fives {self love}. How often are we so hard on ourselves when we mama's forget the tiniest little detail, even after nailing every other thing throughout the day. It's like we are instantly bad mothers when we forget to sign the permission slip or that it was crazy hair day or we can't find the favorite truck, or the oranges after soccer are sitting on the kitchen counter still. Stop. Remember. Give yourself a HIGH FIVE for every other thing you remembered that day; the fact that you nailed that 3 minute conversation when your little one asked why the sky is blue, or successfully packed everyone a healthy and nutritious lunch that morning, or that everyone made it to school on time, or that you stuck to your commitment of self love and went on a walk ALONE! AHHH, high five it mama!!
The last little tidbit I will share from the book is; Your little slice of heaven.
"Some of us know full well what brings us delight and have managed to hang on to it during the busy mothering days. Others are searching-either feeling we have left it behind with the carefree days before children, or perhaps, have never identified it at all. Life becomes so full that we sometimes forget to fill it with our own joy, but it's never to late to begin again." - Shonda Moralis
"If you are unsure what bring your into this state of flow, I invite you to notice the moments when you are smiling effortlessly. What did you love to do as a child? What did you like to do before kids? When did you lose track of time and were lost in the pure enjoyment of something? It it's not immediately clear, keep observing, keep challenging yourself, keep stepping our of your comfort zone. Flow will eventually show up. You will know it when you feel it." - Shonda Moralis
Click HERE to purchase Breathe Mama Breathe - 5 Minute Mindfulness for Busy Moms
Go ahead. Wish yourself a happy birthday.
Happy birthday to me!
Wow, that feels sort of vein wishing myself a happy birthday. But why? Why do we place meaning on celebrating ourselves, nourishing ourselves, patting ourselves on the back and saying "well done". I am changing that stereotype right now. There is nothing wrong with self love, self praise, and even self gifts every now and again. We give, and give, and give {especially as mamma's} to others and never create space to give to ourselves, celebrate ourselves and all that we are. To quote one of my favorites, Brene Brown "connection doesn't exist without giving and receiving. We need to give and we need to NEED" "don't be afraid to rumble with need, connection, judgement, self-worth, privilege, and asking for help"
Rumbling with need, self worth and judgement really rang true to me. I, like most others, feel weak or vulnerable {which is not my strong suite as I am the rock, the strong mamma} when I need to need. When I need to nourish myself with self love, a pat on the back, a celebration of tackling a mamma challenge. While JP is amazing at filling my cup on a daily basis, there is something different about doing it to yourself. We need to feel good about, know how to, and continuously light our own inner flames. It is our foundation.
Some key learning's and take away's from "Rising Strong" that I want to share with the world and shout from the rooftops {even if you have read this fantastic book you might have forgotten, so here is a reminder}
- When you judge yourself for needing help, you judge those you are helping. When you attach value to giving help, you attach value to needing help {holy moly; this one blew my socks off}
- The danger of tying your self-worth to being a helper is feeling shame when you have to ask for help or when you have to nourish yourself; light your inner flame.
- Offering help is courageous and compassionate, but so is asking for help.
So my challenge and request to all of you in the world, is this. Nee to Need. Celebrate yourself. Nourish yourself. Give to yourself. And don't attach meaning to it. Just do it and feel all the feels that come along with it.
Finding my purpose. I'm on a mission....
"Mamas are born at the same time babies are born"
If nothing else, I hope this post inspires you to create space for achieving your hopes, dreams and businesses post baby. Because there is room for both. If you allow it, the addition of little ones create the opportunity to blossom. To be inspired in a whole new way, on a whole new level.
That's what happened to me anyways. I want to share this story with you :: where I was; where I am; and what I am up to now.
For the past 10+ years I have been in regional manager positions for several retail brands, traveling all over the country; on a mission to "get to the top" in my career. I moved, grooved, worked late; you name it; I was going places in the corporate world.
THEN Dylan came along and rocked my world. At first I didn't know what to do with myself. I had never had that much time both away from "work", and focused on another human other than myself and my career. I felt lost. I couldn't recognize myself or this new life, these new responsibilities. As the months went on I felt less and less like my old self and more and more like this new person that I couldn't quit wrap my head around yet. Then all of a sudden a weight was lifted off my shoulders when I had the conversation with my husband about how I was feeling + my hesitation about going back to "work" in the same capacity. It was definitely not going to allow me to be the mamma I wanted to be for Dylan. Throughout this time I started to feel space for what was possible. My purpose went from being the foggiest EVER to clearer and clearer, as I started getting into my mamma groove. I was so inspired by Dylan's existence. Just looking at him sparked a new energy, feeling, to really start getting after my hopes, dreams and passions in a big way.
So long story short, I didn't go back, I never looked back and.... Boom! All this space opened up for creativity, entrepreneurship, connection, and the things I really wanted to do and be. Now let me tell you that doing all these things + being a mamma to Dylan is no walk in the park. Some days I am not sure I can do it all, or anything at all for that matter. And what keeps me driving forward is the element of fun, excitement and exhilaration that comes with doing the things you are MOST passionate about. Doing the things that you where put on this planet to do {your purpose}. It has been the most incredibly challenging, rewarding and heart felt experience :)
What am I up to now??
My mission looks something like this :: connect and inspire mamas around the world to find there purpose & go after their hope and dreams. This is through writing & connecting mamma's at Salty Hair Mamma {www.saltyhairmamma.com} {stay tuned for a mamma tribe page coming soon to the blog}; bringing the movement of our bodies through the practice of yoga to mamma's, babies & kiddos {www.littleomyogatribe} and partnering, participating and supporting radical mama experiences.
Some of my mamma experiences and connections thus far include :: The Great Jane {happening in Ojai www.thegreatjane.com}, the Mom Made Market {coming to Santa Barbara in October www.themommademarket.com}, the Mindfulness Mission with Mindful Mamas {happening now through www.mindfulmamas.com}.
Thanks for reading my story. I believe in you. Come with me on this journey called mamma life.
Choosing how your story ends.
I have been really inspired lately by what I am reading in Brene Browns latest book, Rising Strong. Particularly the daily, weekly, monthly, yearly stories that happen in our lives. Every minute, every hour, every day is a new one. How cool is that?!? We constantly have the opportunity to build the story of 'us' in everything we do.
What really has been hitting me hard lately is when things happen in our stories that are out of our controle or we don't plan or are just not turning out as expected. In that moment we have a choice. To choose the outcome. To choose what happens next. Every day, choose how your story ends, even if the chapters unfolding throughout the day are hard.
This picture of me pregnant with Dylan showed up in my Facebook feed the other day as a "memory". I became overwhelmed with gratitude for the 9 month story of my pregnancy. I reflected on the moments that, as I said earlier, didn't go as planned, were hard, were tiring, were painful. And how happy the ending of that story in my life has made me. The choice to make our 2 a 3, create our family and write another chapter in our story has completed me.
This mamma adventure is for sure another story and I am practicing choice every hour of every day; choosing how I know I want each story to end. Getting real and raw with emotions that play into the story, embracing them and choosing what will happen next. It won't always be perfect, but will be a choice.
Finding bliss in a daily hot shower.
The definition of bliss goes like this.....
{perfect happiness; great joy} {typically so as to be oblivious of everything else}
It's the little things these days that I find bliss in; that keep me going; that are truly how I rejuvenate.
Don't get me wrong, yoga will always be at my core and a way to totally surrender and achieve a state of ultimate bliss. Being a mamma requires you to give everything, all day, every day: and these days the occasional yoga class is just not enough.
I crave more. Every day I need a moment of bliss.
A wise mamma told me right after Dylan was born; "always make time for a daily hot shower". I thought to myself, "obviously" "I always take showers daily". What I didn't realize at the time was just how important that daily hot shower was going to be.
Each night, after Dylan is sleeping, I hand JP the baby monitor and say; "your in charge...I am taking a hot shower".
That moment of release, of passing the baton, of entering my sanctuary {the bathroom}, is something I look forward to and NEED in my life daily. Entering the bathroom, closing the door, turning on the shower and letting the steam take over: mind, body, spirit: is like no other.
Letting the hot water fall over my head, my face, and my body is just the sort of thing that rejuvenates my spirit and allows me to sit in a state of true bliss... even if just for 30 minutes.
My advise to mamma's out there. NEVER give up your daily hot shower. Find your bliss in that moment. Use it as your fuel to be all you need to be for your family and little angels in your lives.
Swim, swim, swimming.
Dylan and I have been enrolled in swim lessons since he was about 4 months old. There is nothing he loves better than spending time in the pool kicking, scooping, splashing, and dunking. It is such a special 30 minutes of time for us each week. In addition to the time we spend together, bonding in the pool, there are several emotional and physical health benefits of introducing babies to swimming early on. I have noticed all of these with Dylan in the 2 months we have been swimming together....
1. Confidence and self esteem - Praise and recognition of achievements in swimming and water confidence boost a child's confidence and self esteem.
2. Physical independence and self-awareness - A baby who is used to being stationary can mover about independently in the water, they learn balance and coordination. The motion and sensation of the water gives an awareness of self.
3. Water awareness and basic life saving - children who attend regular swimming lessons will gain a respect for water and awareness water safety. Most swimming classes now will aim to introduce basic water safety skills.
4. Healthy life style - getting into a good active lifestyle early on will set the ground for your child's future and will become the norm!
5. Language development - Most baby swim classes will now use word association and repetition as part of their core learning methods, for example we say "kick, kick, kick" when moving about the pool, and "hold on", and "scoop, scoop, scoop", and "ready to go swimming!".
6. Brain development - By stimulating senses of the normal every day experiences, the word association, independence and physical awareness all encourage brain development.
7. Social skills - interacting with other babies and children, learning to wait their turn and praise the efforts of others instill good social skills, team work and independence. Dylan LOVES seeing his swim buddies every week :)
8. Bonding - swimming with your child is a very intimate experience, with no other distractions. Building trust, and building a solid foundation for your relationship.
9. Health benefits - swimming has been proven to strengthen the heart and lungs and improve muscle development. Mothers with postpartum depression find the bonding time and mild exercise very beneficial.
10. Improved sleep - Children who undertake physical exercise will sleep better! I mean I can 100% attest to this. Dylan naps SO WELL after our swim lesson! Swimming is a GREAT form of exercise.
It's 1:00 am. What are you doing?
I have been awake at 1:00 am, every night, for the past 6 months. Some might think that sounds atrocious, and in the beginning I certainly did. I got into this pattern of thinking... "I will NEVER sleep through the night again". It was a tough thought to wrap my head around. And then something shifted. Something in the way that Dylan latches onto me, snuggles up against me, and the sound of his gentle breathing at 1:00 am that makes it OK. I started to think about all the other mamma's in the world also up at 1:00 am; doing the very same thing. It's sort of like this secret society of mamma's, sending energy out to each other of strength, love, grace, and blessings. In a way it feels special...sacred. The thoughts that go through your mind at 1:00 am can be interesting, that's for sure. Some times I have songs stuck in my head from the day that play over and over. Some times I am chanting SO HUM to try and relax my mind. And then some times I have the very most creative ideas pop into my brain at this ungodly hour of the morning. It is crazy how the mind works. When it chooses to spark creativity and when it chooses to be stuck. Stuck in a place you just can't seem to get out of.... that is until you decide to embrace 1:00 am as the creative witching hour.
On soul mates
I believe in soul mates. JP and I met when I was 15 (I am 34 now so you do the math). The universe put us on this planet to be together. It has not always been the smoothest of rides, and we always end up right where we need to be....together. While some would say our personalities are polar opposites, we balance each other out and let's be honest; he completes me as a human being. Since Dylan has come into the world we have had to work extra hard to make time for US, you know like it used to be. Everyday I remind myself to take a few minutes for him, even when I am exhausted and Dylan has been consuming everything that I have to offer. What is working...... Grace. Grace with ourselves and this new life we are navigating. Oh, AND making time for monthly date nights. Just the two of us.
Photo credit :: Pix Photography LLC (click photo to view @pixphotographyllc)
He's Here!
Dylan came into this world on October 3, 2015. I love being his mamma. I feel blessed he chose me. Because I really feel like he did choose, and the universe said we were meant to be together.